The cast of Expendables

I have been very much inspired by this movie. The childhood dream of watching all the action heroes together coming to reality was too much for me. This is a perfect example of a shitty story saved by the megastar cast. It proves that old-timers like Arnold, Sly, Bruce, Dolph, Chuck, JCVD can still kick ass. The good news is that E2 has managed to gather the A-list of all-time action-movie stars; the bad news is that as a result, whether or not you liked the original Expendables, E2 will be far from the best action flick in which the dudes in the film have starred. (Okay, except maybe Dolph.) 

So I was thinking of the best, ass-kicking action movies these guys have individually worked in. and I came up with these.

Sylvester Stallone

Rocky: It’s the best underdog movie. Both on and behind the camera. I heard that it was written by a nobody named Sylvester Stallone and the makers were not keen on his insistence to do the lead role himself. They finally relented, and the world was treated to the story of a goofy simpleton and middling club fighter Rocky Balboa who stumbles into an unlikely chance to fight the heavyweight champion of the world, Apollo Creed. Rocky doesn’t win, but he goes the distance (15 rounds) with Creed after participating in the best training montage ever put on film.

Runners up: First Blood. When a small town dictatorial sheriff messes with a peace-loving but troubled war veteran, things start to get messy for the police. The action takes some time to come but it’s worth the wait.

Arnold Schwarzenneger

Predator: there are so many Arnie movies that picking up from them is a difficult task. My favorite is Predator. It triumphs over Judgment Day because of its cast. it does an awesome job characterizing the bunch of misfit soldiers. Then there is the arm-wresting match. The special effects were wonderful for those times and hold up today also.

Runners up: Terminator 2: Judgment Day. Period.

Bruce Willis

Die Hard: Termed as the greatest action movie ever made. Bruised, battered, shoeless, and bleeding out, John McClane goes all Thor lightening on terrorists at the Nakatomi Plaza. The movie has a tight script, a classic bad guy in Hans Gruber — for a long amount of time the best action-movie villain before being bettered by the Joker in Dark Knight — and just the right amount of humor.

Runners up: Pulp Fiction. In spite of all the blood and gore, it’s hard to call Pulp Fiction an action movie. It’s a cult classic nonetheless.

Jason Statham

Having starred in numerous action movies in a non-central role, Statham got his chance in The Transporter. One thing that this movie teaches us – never open another person’s mail. Unless you dig asian chicks.

Runners up: Crank. The sheer pace of this movie blows me off.

Jet Li

Lethal Weapon IV: I can’t remember the names of most of his movies. The first time I saw him was in this one. Most of the time he remains quite, in the background. But when he explodes, reminds us of a certain chap called Bruce Lee.

Runners up: Romeo Must Die.

Dolph Lundgren

Rocky IV: Definitely. The process of “acting” takes a backseat in his movies. That’s why I think Rocky IV was tailor-made for him. It was as if Rocky Balboa was fighting The Terminator. But the defeat in the climax reminds us that he’s human.

Runners up: The Expendables. Let’s be frank, he hasn’t worked in very many good movies.

Jean-Claude Van Damme

Bloodsport: Bloodsport is Van Damme at his finest. It’s full of badass training and fighting montages, and Ogre from Revenge of the Nerds plays JCVD’s sidekick. What else could you possibly want in a 80s action flick?

Runners up: Hard Target, is not director John Woo’s finest work, but there is a scene in which JCVD, sporting a mullet, a terrible creole accent, and Wilford Brimley as a sidekick, punches out a snake. That’s right — he punches. out. a. snake. 

Chuck Norris

Way of the Dragon: Not more than 15 minutes was his total screen time in this movie. But there was this all time greatest duel in the end. Probably the only time he lost. Unlike Rajnikant.